Ray,
I really don't know how feel, so I won't go there.
I will say, I think what you're feeling is normal.
It's not the same thing, but when I was growing up, I spent every summer in southern Oregon with my grandparents, right on the mighty Rogue River, by far some of the best times of my life, a few years back I lost my grandmother to cancer, a couple years before that, my grandfather.
One of the best therapies I have yet to come accross is all of the happy/funny stroies and good memories that we have shared over the years (my grandmother called herself the worlds oldest living teenager).
After my garandad passed, there was a river race in Gold Beach (where he was from), every boat that was owned by someone who knew him had an "In Loving Memory Of" sticker on the hull, I cannot tell you the overrun of emotions that brought up. He was a well liked guy that would stop to help just about anyone.
I guess what i am really trying to say is, I feel for your loss, remember the positive and move on my friend, life is to be lived and enjoyed with people that you will miss when they are gone...
Sorry to sound like a Halmark card, but think it over
GT
