SoCal Jet Boats
Discussion => The No Wake Zone => WarZone => Topic started by: Luckie Stiff on August 12, 2009, 06:57:55 AM
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A farmer had a bunch of laying hens, and one old rooster, he noticed that his egg count was down and figured it was the old rooster just not being able to keep up with the hens. Off he goes to get a new rooster, he comes home with a new, young rooster and puts him in with the hens and the old rooster. The young rooster quickly gets to work molesting all the hens in an attempt to get the eggs coming. After a bit the young guy takes a little break, the old rooster walks over to talk to him;
Old Rooster: "Nice work, I'm sure the farmer will like you, can I ask a favor of you?"
Young Rooster: "What's that old man?"
Old Rooster: "Could you have a little mercy on an old man and leave me those 2 old hens over there?"
Young Rooster: "Nope, ALL of these hens are mine, your time has come old man"
Old Rooster: "Ok, then how 'bout a race around the yard, if I win, I get the 2 old hens, you win, you get them all"
Young Rooster: "A race? What are you retarded? I'm younger, stronger and faster than you, you're on"
And with that the old rooster takes off around the yard catching the young guy off guard, the young rooster is now trailing the old one when all of a sudden the old rooster begins to make so much noise clucking and crowing and whatnot that the old farmer comes out of his house to see what the ruckus is all about. He sees the young rooster, now right on the old rooster's tail, chasing the old rooster around the yard. He goes back into the house, grabs his shotgun and takes aim, shot the young rooster dead in his ass.
"HMMPH!" "Another damn queer!"
The old rooster has his 2 hens................
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LOL :D
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LMAO!
Got another oldie, on those same lines...
Farmers hens aren't laying eggs, so another farmer tells him, "you need a good rooster, I got one for ya, Brewster!"
So the farmer gets Brewster the Rooster, and as soon as he lets him out of the truck, he tears into the hen house servicing all the hens. Farmer's like 'Damn, guess they were right!"
Later in the day, farmer sees the rooster chasing and violating the sheep, catches the rooster and says "Brewster, you better calm down, you're gonna kill yourself"
After dinner, he walks out and finds the rooster chasing the goats around, catches him again and says " You better knock this off, you're gonna kill yourself"
Rest of the evening went the same way with the geese, the pigs, even the cats.
About bedtime, he hears a commotion with the horses and runs to the barn to find the Rooster chasing the horses around. Yet Again, catches him and tells him "Stop it! you're gonna kill yourself" Brewster agrees and went back to the henhouse.
The next morning, Farmer wakes up, opens his blinds and sees Buzzards circling the hen house. Gets dressed, walks out, and there's Brewster, on his back, feet in the air tongue hanging out, and he says "I told you, slow down, you were gonna kill yourself"
Brewster opens one eye and says "Shut up and get the f*** outta here old man, can't you see they're about to land?"
Ray
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needed that today! Stayed up to watch the meteor shower last night and only got 4 hours of sleep. Thanks for making my day! ;D