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Discussion => The No Wake Zone => WarZone => Topic started by: rebel on December 05, 2007, 02:38:37 PM

Title: When girls don't put out!! good humor
Post by: rebel on December 05, 2007, 02:38:37 PM
When girls don't put out!!

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so
much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have
never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.  Well, the
passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I
just want you to hold me.'

I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me
to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who
I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on
several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to
take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond
earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was
one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because
she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play
tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was
almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with
excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier.'

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel
like it.'

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled,
'WHAT?'

I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're
just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy
your shopping needs as a woman.'

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why
can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch
knows I'm smarter than her.
Title: Re: When girls don't put out!! good humor
Post by: FORKEDUP on December 05, 2007, 03:28:42 PM
 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: When girls don't put out!! good humor
Post by: Blue on December 05, 2007, 03:41:01 PM
We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store.



So you took her to Wal Mart??? No wonder no vag///
Title: Re: When girls don't put out!! good humor
Post by: 82daytona on December 05, 2007, 03:50:54 PM
 ;D :o
Title: Re: When girls don't put out!! good humor
Post by: 2savage4you on December 05, 2007, 06:50:35 PM
That was good ;)


2sav
Title: Re: When girls don't put out!! good humor
Post by: AQUAHOLIC on December 05, 2007, 07:21:29 PM
that was classic. i cant wait to show some people
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