I gotta tell you about the cat. My late wife's cat. This is gonna be a long one, I'll forewarn the uninformed about my posts.
hated this Phucker. male cat, neutered, all that, like 19 years old as of December. Used to attack me if I went near Cin, and then when I'd toss him across the room, he'd go piss or shit on something of mine. Did that even if I DIDN'T do anything to him. Cin had him since she found him in a alley as a kitten. Phucker was tossed out my his own mother if you ask me. DAm Thing used to walk through the room and stare me down to see how it could ruin my day one way or another. Climb on the counter and dig out what was cooking in the crock pot or open the cupboards and knock out all the pots and pans. All sorts of evil things. Much more but I'm trying to be breif.
Made it my point, to try and off the thing as natural as I could. At 19, how good could it's heart be? right?
Walk up when it was sleeping, scare the snot out of it quite regularly, tossed it into the pool more than once (Didn't get any action for a month or so after THAT one). Thing just WOULD NOT DIE.
Turned out it didn't like Anti-Freeze either, something someone told me to try. I even resorted to rubbing bacon on the som byatch (True story, hell OJ got way with MUCH worse) and sicking the dog on him thinking.......well.......I dunno, surely she wouldn't hate the dog...... Nope, all the dog did was chase him down and lick him for an hour (hmmmmmm Light bulb goes off........Peanut butter's got nothing on bacon...........). Anyway, Something about women and cats, dunno, never really understood women either, but like my grandfather always said, do NOT mess with them. Anything that can bleed for a week straight on a regular basis and not die, you dun wanna mess with.
Don't get me wrong, I'm an animal lover. Just that this thing was an angel when Cin was around, but left to his own devices or when I was around alone, he was like the cat on Pet Semetary. Pure evil. After Cin died, about a month in fact, I took it to the vet to have him put down. I felt bad and honestly tried to make up with the cat, given what happened, and spoiled him rotten. That morning he went on the one way trip, he took a dump on MY pillow!. Last straw.
That was that, took him to the vet. They try and console me about the whole thing, hell I was ready to throw a kegger! They asked if I wanted his body or ashes back, I was like, oh Hell no, this thing has already pissed and crapped on most everything I own, I am NOT putting his ashes on more of my shit! nor am I burying it anywhere near the same! Then they asked if I wanted to be around when they did it. Again, hell no, while it might be satisfying to a certain degree, I don't need that last look of "I'm still gonna mess with you from the afterlife" thing. I already tried on multiple occassions to kill it, good luck to you, I told them.
Funniest part was my dog. Used her leash to take the cat. Minute she sees a leash she's uncontrollable, wants out the front door for a walk. Now she see's the leash and hides under the end table. Last time that was used he didn't come back, she ain't stupid!.
Long and morbid, but OHHHH so SATISFYING!
Ray
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