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MADSKILLZ

  • Karma: +16/-0
Funny Story!!!!!
« on: March 12, 2009, 08:18:57 PM »
I have 2 dogs & I was buying a large bag of Winalot in the local supermarket, I was standing in the queue at the till when the woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

 On impulse, I told her no, I was starting The Winalot Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and the way that it works is to load your trouser pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

 I have to mention here that practically everyone in the queue was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her. Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the road licking my balls and a car hit me.

 I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out through the door.

 Stupid cow..........why else would I buy dog food?

 

  • Boat #1: 2000 TPR Deck Boat
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flytime

  • Karma: +21/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #1 on: March 12, 2009, 08:28:40 PM »
Oh my god Nick.....I am going to pee my pants ;D ;D ;D
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the jet boat never did this to you bob ::)
Can I get next in line behind The Beav

snuff630

  • Karma: +0/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #2 on: March 12, 2009, 08:57:54 PM »
HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!  Goodtimes!!!  ;D
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OC2Vegas

  • Karma: +12/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #3 on: March 12, 2009, 09:02:15 PM »
Thats almost as good as the "Im on a boat" song!  :D
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1979 Sanger Superjet
BBC, 12JG

Brad @ SCJB

  • Karma: +255/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #4 on: March 12, 2009, 09:06:09 PM »
hahaha

lmfaooooo

good shit man.
  • Boat #1: 1978 Liberty
  • Boat #2: 1982 Eliminator Sprint
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bkplesh

  • Karma: +7/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #5 on: March 12, 2009, 09:27:53 PM »
me and the wife are laughing our asses off ;D
« Last Edit: March 13, 2009, 06:31:29 PM by bkplesh »
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MADSKILLZ

  • Karma: +16/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #6 on: March 12, 2009, 09:30:05 PM »
 ;D ;D >:D
  • Boat #1: 2000 TPR Deck Boat
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GT Jets

  • Karma: +192/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #7 on: March 12, 2009, 10:20:31 PM »
I was having the worst evening ever...til now, Thanks, I needed that one fo sho O0

GT
  • Boat #1: 1992 Carrera 20.5 Elite (I/O bitches)
  • Boat #2: 19' Bubble deck Jet BBC Berkeley
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If i get some free time tonight at work, ill play with it and post it for everyone to see.

Time to man up and yank it John!  :banghead:
Ray

IRRebel

  • Karma: +16/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #8 on: March 13, 2009, 02:06:41 AM »
OMFG that's funny, can't stop re reading it, lol Copy and paste, copy and paste.......

Ray
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"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways totally worn out shouting 'Holy Shit what a ride!"---Crewcheif22 AKA Keith

76NORDIC

  • Karma: +23/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #9 on: March 13, 2009, 09:19:10 AM »
In my office reading this, and started to LMAO, couple of guys in here also , looking at me funny, like I lost it :screwy:  Good one CJ    ;D ;D
  • Boat #1: 76 Nordic BBF 460 Jet
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The definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results.....Einstein

I refuse to call people an ass anymore. It insults hard working donkeys worldwide!

82daytona

  • Karma: +7/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #10 on: March 13, 2009, 10:08:39 AM »
good one

stc315

  • Karma: +3/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #11 on: March 13, 2009, 04:02:31 PM »
too funny  ;D
  • Boat #1: 1987 Baker Tunnel Jet
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"Too much horsepower is almost enough!!!"

SLCKREG

  • Karma: +0/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #12 on: March 13, 2009, 04:20:46 PM »
Phuck I'm jealous.....you can lick your balls :o ;D. lol Yep common sense isn't very common is it. I have to tell you one of mine(yours is funnier) but it's true none the less. A decade or so I shoot an elk opening morning, we hunt for another hour or so(was prime time), go back and I gut it. Bro throws is on the atv to drive it back to camp I start walking. Then it happens the first time, a couple of guys coming up the trail stop and ask me "did ya get 1?", I stare at my blood covered arms and say, yes. :screwy:  5 minutes later here comes another group of guys" did ya shoot something" I look at my blood covered body again and say " sure looks that way" :screwy: I'm looking around did someone drop a dumb azz bomb or wtf!   A few minutes later I shit you not here comes a 3rd group, pull up , "did ya get one" I say nope....just my time of the month.
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flytime

  • Karma: +21/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #13 on: March 13, 2009, 04:25:40 PM »
Here's your sign........
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the jet boat never did this to you bob ::)
Can I get next in line behind The Beav

MADSKILLZ

  • Karma: +16/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #14 on: March 13, 2009, 07:31:45 PM »
 ;D
  • Boat #1: 2000 TPR Deck Boat
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TrollerDave

  • Karma: +32/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #15 on: March 14, 2009, 12:43:52 AM »
Phuck I'm jealous.....you can lick your balls :o ;D.
He might let you, just buy him a drink first .



And don't do it in the middle of the street :o
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FORKEDUP

  • Karma: +4/-0
Re: Funny Story!!!!!
« Reply #16 on: March 14, 2009, 03:26:15 PM »
2 forking funny, i can just imagine the expression on her face >:D ;D
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BEAUTY IS ONLY A LIGHT SWITCH AWAY
26' kachina force 496bbc
19' eliminator daytona 496bbc (still in my heart)
21 Commander, blown 454, berk pump.

 


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