Toes on the Nose

  • Karma: +1/-0
Good one!!
« on: June 02, 2008, 06:09:32 PM »
CHEMISTRY STUDENT
The following is an actual question given on a University of
Washington chemistry mid term.

The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared
it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now
have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
(absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law
(gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some
variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So
we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the
rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume
that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls
are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at
the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their
religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these
religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion,
we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates
as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase
exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in
Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and
pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand
proportionately as souls are added. < /P>

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase
until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls
in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell
freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman
year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,'
and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then
number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic
and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that
since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any
more souls and is therefore, extinct..... .leaving only Heaven,
thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why,
last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.
  • Like
    Dislike
    Love
    HaHa
    Angry
    Surprise
    Sad
    Party
Guns kill people lke spoons made Rosie O'Donnel fat!!

Brad @ SCJB

  • Karma: +255/-0
Re: Good one!!
« Reply #1 on: June 02, 2008, 06:14:01 PM »
great paper.
  • Boat #1: 1978 Liberty
  • Boat #2: 1982 Eliminator Sprint
  • Like
    Dislike
    Love
    HaHa
    Angry
    Surprise
    Sad
    Party

Moneypit

  • Karma: +1/-0
Re: Good one!!
« Reply #2 on: June 03, 2008, 12:32:17 AM »
great paper.

And super good weed.........Only a stoner could come up with that.........MP
  • Like
    Dislike
    Love
    HaHa
    Angry
    Surprise
    Sad
    Party
LOUD BOATS SAVE LIVES

GlassCutter

  • Karma: +31/-0
Re: Good one!!
« Reply #3 on: June 03, 2008, 06:05:15 AM »
Better living thru better chemicals   ;)
  • Boat #1: 1973  Wriedt Montara 23
  • Boat #2: 1978 Spectra 20 460/Berkley
  • Like
    Dislike
    Love
    HaHa
    Angry
    Surprise
    Sad
    Party
Also, I will kiss bare male ass in the middle of the Vegas Strip  . . .  I will post pics if I need to.  --  IRRebel 2013

"Go ahead Rivertard does it.  Take a video though."

"If you did it in a dodge it would have shifted perfectly ran a thousand miles per hour and got optimum fuel mileage!"  Nordie  2012

Toes on the Nose

  • Karma: +1/-0
Re: Good one!!
« Reply #4 on: June 03, 2008, 05:52:25 PM »
I wish I came up with it.............
  • Like
    Dislike
    Love
    HaHa
    Angry
    Surprise
    Sad
    Party
Guns kill people lke spoons made Rosie O'Donnel fat!!

 


SMFPacks CMS 1.0.3 © 2020