any suggestions on where to get one that has all NPT fittings but doesnt cost an arm and a leg like a danny olsen?  ive seen a few from hardin marine but im not sure what size id need. 

maybe something like this?

http://www.hardin-marine.com/p-13295-oil-cooler-2-diameter-8-length-34-npt-connection.aspx

or is bigger better?

http://www.hardin-marine.com/p-13417-oil-cooler-2-diameter-16-length-34-npt-connection.aspx

see what oil temps you are running now, you may not need one

Pan size, type, windage tray, BEARING CLEARANCES, how much horsepower, outside temp, aftermarket block, tall deck/standard deck(BBChevy), are the water jackets filled, oil pump volume, oil drainback type, is the oiling system modified for better flow?, covered engine compartment, oil viscosity and type, remote dual or standard filter, do you run a thermostat, do you over or under fill the pan? These are just some of the things that affect the oil temp. Bottom line: Borrow or buy an infrared, noncontact temp gun, read the temp during cruise, and read it again after a long/hard run and see what it is. Cruise at about 120/140 is normal, after a hard run it can go to 220/240 without problems. I have a few Mercruiser coolers left (cheap)and they have a section for the power steering pump cooling, which I sometimes use to precool the fuel for more HP, especially with EFI.  TIMINATOR

pan is just a normal pan right now, nothing nice. thats next on the list...

i dunno the oil temp both no gauge and i havent really ran it yet, other than a trial run and i was more concerned about a leak i had near the pump.  motor is just a stockish 454 with a mild cam.

is there such a thing as "too cool" for oil?  i figured $100 and some misc lines and parts for a cooler can give me peace of mind. 

Yes there is such a thing as to cool.....needs to get at least 210 ish to get rid of condensation. I was suprised how long it takes my oil to heat up. Before my gauge I guarantee ya I was hammering on my motor with the oil too cold....lucky I didn't take out a bearing.

normal car/truck pan =5-6quarts, take $100 and apply towards good 10 quart pan and that alone will bring your oil temp down and give you more capasity

Yep.